It seems that being a mother is a quite complicated process, to me at least. As soon as I think I have it all figured out and we reach a plateau, I find myself pondering and drifting in a new direction. I am always in pursuit of new mothering ideas and trying to accomodate my growing girls needs. So this is not a smooth process because I am a perfectionist and I love to have everything figured out but with kids it is not that easy. They keep changing and I need to catch up with them. It used to be so easy to entertain them when they were younger, all I needed to do was to hang out with them and play with them on the floor of their room. But now it is different and I am still unsure how I fit in that new picture. While they still need me, they don’t seem to want to play the way they used to and I have a feeling they are bored with our current arrangement. I am also venturing more towards radical unschooling as I am meeting new people and the girls are making friends within that group. That shifts our attitudes and my perception of how to take care of them but leaves me without any definite answers. Yes, I know I will find them (the answers) but I am anxious to know where we are heading.
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There has been a lot of talk lately about embracing one’s own darkness and in all honesty, I have found this concept too vague to comprehend. What is that darkness […]